End Of The Selah, Start Of The Song

I return home tonight. They say home is where the heart is. But I feel that my heart has been spread so wide and so thin. Ten days away from home has helped somewhat. I've had loads of time to pray and read and meditate on the future. I've learnt a lot from the books by Rob Bell, the teachings by Rachel and Daniel at Revo, the giddy antics of Reggie Dabs and raw anointing on his testimony. Seeing hundreds of kids coming forward to give their lives to Jesus makes you wish you could somehow be part of that.

Maybe I didn't get the direction that I desired. But I know, I caught something here in Perth. Maybe its when the Holy Spirit crashed into me like a ton of bricks after Daniel prayed for me at Revolution. It was wave after wave of pure strong love. Its like God had punctuated the last sentence of the chapter. It was like the turning of the page.

I hope that me being here has touched some lives.

I hope I represented Agape to Eileen. The Love that expects nothing in return. No agenda, no ulterior motive. That she deserves better than what she's received so far. That she is beautiful no matter what the situation. Brokenness is a bad thing. But when out of it flows a song, it brings healing. Keep singing, nightingale...

I pray that Daniel keeps preaching and preaching the Word. So that all around him are built up in Faith by hearing and hearing. I pray for more opportunities for Kingdom talk.

I hope Kenny saw me giving 10 dollars to the homeless man outside Miss Maud's. I hope Kenny understands that it wasn't to shut the man's drunken babble and chase him away. But an excuse to touch him, overwhelm him and heal him with the presence of God and a prayer. This is bring the baptism of God to the world. You know. Like Jesus said. Bringing the Word to reality.

I haven't mentioned Cheryl who I can't believe only just turned 18. Jessica, the Bible freak, who manage to share deep revelations during lifegroup to end any chance of discussion and yet remain as ditsy as ever. Jonathan who is as funny as heck. Liane who taught me how to use the flash on the EOS 500D. Raymond who looks like he'll fit into the hardcore scene in Singapore but sings boyband songs during Karaoke. Petrina, who is always full of Grace and Beauty.

It is so nice to come to a place and belong. I may be going home. But I feel like I'm leaving home too. All of you made it worth it.

Justice, Mercy, Compassion

Do we even know what those words really mean? Or have they just become part of the Christian's vocabulary? Piled together with words like Faith, Evangelism, Righteousness?

In Zechariah 7:9 it says, "This is what the LORD Almighty says: 'Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another."

I believe that most of us, deep down in our hearts, desire to do what is right. We have heard the inspiration of the pioneers of the cause, seen the videos that made us cry, read the testimonies and reflected on what we should do.

But the truth is, we're all too busy to care. I do not say this to condemn. There's nothing wrong with being busy. We have our school, our work, our friends and family. They require our time too. I sometimes have no time to pray or even think about the unsheltered, the sick and the dying in my own country. There are needs. Too many. Each crying out like a wounded man on side of the road. I simply do not do enough. As if to prove my point, Michelle just gave me a link to a trailer for part 2 of Hillsong United's I-Heart Revolution, "We're All In This Together". In it, Joel Houston, in his usual haunting, soul-rending monologue asks, "...and you see these streets, you see people going about their lives. If what is going on in these four walls is having no effect on the streets that we travel to get there, then maybe we are missing the point?"

I guess this is what this trip is all about. To find the point.

Worship. Youth. Missions.

I have been formed for these.

I think often of the passage in Matthew 6:25-34. It starts off like this, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear."

I think often of how I hardly know any Christian who lives it out or even comes near to doing so. It’s simply too radical.

Do not worry? Don’t worry about what we shall eat or drink or wear? Just seek first God’s kingdom and everything will be OK?

That is faith in God’s providence. Isn’t it the worry of what people would eat, drink and wear in future that motivates people to save and invest for the future? Isn’t it simply the lack of trust that God will provide in every way that makes us just focus on accumulating and investing money for ourselves and our future, rather than using it to help those who need it more than us right now?

I do not have the answers to those questions. What I do know is that I want to have a lifestyle where I can give abundantly like God does. If anything, I want to be known for taking things to the extreme. For extreme generosity, for extreme gentleness, for extreme Love. That would be how Jesus would do it, I believe.

Could that be the one thing? Love?

What if you could choose to Love wholeheartedly and expect nothing in return?
What if we really could Love till a person's worth is unveiled?

1 Peter 4:8 says, "keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins."

Earnestly... Fervently... The word here in the Greek means with an intent to be stretched out for someone.

Just like Jesus on the Cross.

Reasons To Leave....

Sometimes, I make decisions which can shock people. Or at least cause some eyebrows to be raised. I won't say that God made me this way because it wouldn't do God justice. As if He did something wrong. No. I would say He is still forming me. I don't intend to offend. I would apologise if that helps.

But it doesn't. In fact, I am not sorry.

Joshua came back from the UK to have a wedding reception for his friends in Singapore. I had the privilege of meeting his wife, Hannah. I can't believe I told Michelle that she wasn't pretty. I think I was in some sort of denial. It took just 5 seconds for me to realise that I was sincerely wrong. Joshua found someone that exuded beauty both inside and out.

That man inspires me like music... or poetry. I really loved the conversations that we had, as short as they were. I love the selfless belief. The faith in the Gift that God has placed in me. It takes an extremely Godly man to 'consider others better than yourselves'. (Philippians 2:3)
It was like a change of batteries. A jolt back into the reality of God's purpose for me. Suddenly, I have been feeling like I have to get away from this place. To escape to a place where I can breathe. Where I last felt alive.

I am going to Australia.

This is a new story. About dropping everything for what is important. Friendship, Faith and the fun of finding out whether it is possible to actually walk on eggshells. This is about the changing of mindsets, the renewing of convenants and the discovering of new direction.

This is not an apology...
This is me speaking Life into my purpose. This is me calling Light into my vision.

Maybe you might not understand.

I don't blame you.